Why You Need an Emu Story
A Tool for the Reluctant Networker
I’ve been seeing a statistic floating around the internet for the past few weeks - 85% of jobs are filled through networking.1 For us introverts, this is a terrifying number.
As I’ve been working on building my coaching business, I’ve had to learn how to talk to people about myself. Yikes. First, I had to overcome my inner Judge who says things like, “No one will care about your perspective. Who would come to you for coaching? People are going to laugh at your ideas.”
To start to overcome my inner Judge, I had to learn how to hear its voice and catch those comments. Now, when I hear that voice whispering in my ear, I can pause and say, “Oh, that’s the Judge talking. I’m choosing not to listen.” Naming the voice gives me breathing room. It reminds me that I am more than my negative thoughts, so that I can focus on the person in front of me instead of my fear.
Second, I had to figure out what to say to people. Usually, my mind goes blank when someone asks me a question about myself. How can I get around that? A colleague recommended Better Small Talk by patrick King. In it, he presents the idea of the conversational resume. As a leader, you make decisions all day long. By the time you get to a networking event, you have decision fatigue. A conversational resume protects your energy so you don’t have to scramble for something to say when your brain is already tired.
Preparing a conversational resume before going to different events has been a game changer. It has helped me build confidence and given me something practiced to say when my mind goes blank.
Before We Dive In:
I created ERA Coaching & Consulting for leaders who want to lead with Emotional Intelligence and confidence, so they can experience a transformation from feeling constantly overwhelmed to leading from a healthy, sustainable place.
How do you create a conversational resume?
Start by thinking about the questions that you hear the most often. How was your weekend? Did you catch (insert sports event here)? Tell me more about your work.
Then, start brainstorming ways to answer them. Wherever possible, you want the answer to be lighthearted and funny so that you will be remembered. Consider these examples based on my weekend:
The generic approach: Oh, this weekend, I went to a farm with my family.
The Conversational Resume Approach: This weekend, I was chased by an emu while a goat tried to eat my shirt!
image by: Carlos Delgado; CC-BY-SA
The first example shuts down conversation or forces your conversation partner to draw information out of you. The second example invites people into your story. It shows that you’re human, you’re approachable, and you don’t take yourself too seriously. We’re drawn to this type of person.
Of course, people can ask about a number of different things, so I try to think through these questions so that I have answers at the ready.
What do you do outside of work? (hobby, volunteer)
What is something that you recently read or a show you watched that has made you think?
Describe your life motto in 6 words.
What is a topic you could give a 5-minute presentation on right now with zero preparation?
Flip the Script
Remember, networking is a two-way street. If you are feeling nervous, the person across from you probably is too. The greatest gift you can give them is a good question that lets them drop the mask. (Make sure you can answer these, too, in case your conversation partner asks you the same thing!)
What is the best thing that happened to you this week, no matter how small?
What is the most interesting thing you’re working on right now?
How did you get connected to this event/organization?
I’m always looking for recommendations; have you read or watched anything good lately?
Act on It
Set a timer for 5 minutes today. Pick just one of the questions above and draft your “emu story.” Write it down, say it out loud to your cat, or practice it in the car on your way to a networking event. The next time you walk into a room, you’ll have one tool ready in your back pocket.
What have you done to make networking easier? Let me know in the comments!
https://www.zippia.com/advice/networking-statistics/